The 81st Annual Academy Awards: Our Reaction

When Hugh Jackman took the stage at last night’s Oscars, we were skeptical. But Wolverine delivered!

Performing on the most beautiful Oscar stage we’ve ever seen, Hugh slipped into a low-budget song and dance number that was the best opening the Oscars have had since the Billy Crystal years.

The producer’s decision to “downsize” the show because of the recession ended up inspiring the most creative, funny, well-executed kick off the show has had in recent memory.

With pizza box props and Craigslist dancers (hell yeah!), we were cheering, though, were we the only ones who felt like Jackman really went for the gusto when he sang “It’s alright to be gay”? We’re not sayin’…we’re just sayin’.

Anne Hathaway was charming. Who knew Nixon could be that delightful? We love Frost/Nixon as a hot, Harlequin musical and Hugh’s techno ode to The Reader was so funny even he couldn’t keep a straight face…and we love that!

An absolutely brilliant opening.

As the first award of the evening, the Oscar for Best Supporting Actress, is handed out, Goldie Hawn, Tilda Swinton, Eva Marie Saint, Angelica Houston (in an amazing dress) and Whoopi Goldberg emerge unexpectedly. This year, each acting honor was handed out this way, a torch being passed by a fellowship of other extraordinary performers who each, one by one, recognize the nominees in the category. It was original, heartfelt, respectful and imbued with a sense of ceremony and honor award shows profoundly lack. 

“Has anyone ever fainted here? Because I might be the first one,” Penelope Cruz says as she wins for her role in Vicky Cristina Barcelona.

Steve Martin and Tina Fey step onto the stage to present the awards for best Original and Adapted Screenplay. Tina Fey and Steve Martin together? This is officially the best Oscars ever.

Dustin Lance Black’s speech for his Best Original Screenplay win for Milk is the first time in the broadcast we are moved to tears as he speaks about growing up as a homosexual man in a Mormon community and taking his moment on a worldwide stage to reassure kids like him that, no matter what they’re told, they are “beautiful, wonderful creatures of value…who one day soon will have rights federally across this nation.”

Jennifer Aniston comes out and we’re screaming for the producers to cut a shot of Brad and Angie in the front row. Come on!!!! When they finally oblige, Ange and Brad are both grinning from ear to ear. Are they all really making nicey-nice or are they just faking it really well because they know 300 bagillion people are watching the broadcast? Hmmmm.

The Brechtian tact the show is taking is marvelous as it walks viewers through the process of filmmaking. Art direction and makeup honors have never been this beautifully staged. 

Ben Stiller comes out as Joaquin Phoenix with Natalie Portman during the cinematography award and his imitation is spot on. “You look like you work at a Hassidic meth lab,” Portman says. Hahahah! Even his peers think Joaquin is acting the fool. Love it!

Ummm, if Beyonce is so amazing, why is she lipsyncing through the big ol’ musical number Baz Luhrmann staged? We can’t wait to hear her excuse for pulling an Ashlee Simpson. Especially when everyone else, including a criminally underutilized Zac Efron, Hugh Jackman, Vanessa Hudgens, Dominic Cooper and Amanda Seyfried were all singing live.

Heath Ledger’s win, though a foregone conclusion, was a poignant moment and it suddenly struck us how difficult it must have been for his family and friends to have been forced to grieve so publicly.

Queen Latifah’s singing “I’ll Be Seeing You” as a send off to the great talents who passed on this year. It was the best In Memoriam we’ve ever seen because, like the rest of the show, there was an investment in paying homage and truly honoring people.

Danny Boyle, class act that he is, even took the moment to recognize the producers of the show when accepting his award for Slumdog Millionaire. That was just one small part of his utterly winning speech which included him bouncing up and down because once, many years ago, he promised his kids if he ever won an Oscar, he’d accept it as Tigger, actually saying the words “Shout out” and taking the time to apologize to the choreographer of the film’s final dance sequence who he forgot in the film’s credits. We adore Danny Boyle!

Anne Hathaway got such mad love from Shirley MacLaine, she doesn’t need to win anymore. What she was given by MacLaine is WAY better than any Oscar.

Kate Winslet telling her father “Whistle or something” so she’d know where he was in the crowd only to be instantly met with an immediate shrill from the side of the audience. The way Kate’s face lit up at the sound of her dad’s call, we instantly started to cry. Maybe it was because it reminded us of something our dad would do, but was the greatest moment in the Oscar telecast for us.

How does Sean Penn say thank you after winning his second Oscar for his role is Milk? “You commie, homo loving, sons of guns.” And that’s why Sean Penn is the mofo-in’ man.

Capped off by Slumdog’s win for Best Picture, we can easily say this was the best Oscars we’ve ever seen. Beautifully staged, brilliantly directed, original and inspired, the people we were cheering for won and the night was without a single lull.

Bravo. 

–Sasha Perl-Raver