Dancing with the Stars Elimination Night Recap: Week Six

Rather than choosing just one dance to encore, last night the entire cast was invited back to perform the group hip hop number again. We love watching the crowd because seeing everyone dance side by side gives a chance to size the competition up as a whole. Last night, there were moments where we confused Cody for Derek, and that’s a damn good sign for Cody; Cloris, as usual, farted around like a wind-up doll on crack; Susan, again, couldn’t get the steps right and looked totally lost; Lance looked like he was in the "Bye Bye Bye" video; Brooke had a few Susan moments but Lacey killed it and Derek, our super fave, destroyed the dance floor. We want to dance with him so badly, preferably a horizontal mambo…in the nude.

Before the couples have a chance to catch their breath, the first safe couple is announced and it’s Lance and Lacey, followed by Cody who will be coupled with Edyta as Julianne recovers from having her appendix removed.

Rather than filling the dead air with a real performance, they drag out the Ballroom Kids, our least favorite part of the results show. Does anyone care? They’re kids, they dance, the end. We know ABC is cheap but why must they subject us to this week after week instead of investing in real entertainment? 

Luckily, Missy Elliott and the Pussycat Dolls are quick to the rescue with the single “Whatchu Think About That.” PCD kicked off their performance in the usual Sweet Charity, Fosse-style lineup that we’ve come to expect and adore. The truth is, their music is kind of crappy but the dancing is so flashy, the lyrics so catchy, we can’t help but get into it. You know “When I Grow Up” is our jam (“I wanna have boobies”). It’s so fun to see a musical performer who can sing AND dance. When Missy Elliot came through the audience, the crowd went stupid-wild. We didn’t even mind that she was lipsyncing, that’s how fly Missy Elliot is.

After their performance, the next safe couple is announced and it’s Warren and Kym.

Next Michael Flatley, this week’s guest judge and the all-time Lord of the Dance, started his performance with an awesome silhouette dance which was very Fred Astaire or Gene Kelly with a few trademark Flatley kicks thrown in to give it that luck ‘a da Irish-flavor. Then he appeared on stage in a black and white pinstripe suit, spectator tap shoes and a fedora, looking a little like Michael Jackson in the “Smooth Criminal” video, but tapping like Gregory Hines on a three foot by three foot square platform that was lit ablaze by the fire of his tap shoes before erupting in a giant fire ball as Flatley dove onto the dance floor.

Back to the flames of elimination, the next safe couple is Brooke and Derek, followed by Maurice and Cheryl, leaving Susan and Tony and Cloris and Corky in the bottom two.

The sixth couple sent home is…

Cloris and Corky, who were sent off with a standing ovation. Cloris sat on the floor with hosts Tom Bergeron, Samantha Harris and her partner Corky Ballas (poor Corky, he tried so hard) and announced “I’m not leaving. I’m going to get a pretty costume and sit over there next week. I can’t go home.”

Actually Cloris, you can and you are.

And that, dear friends, is what’s called “Cutting the Fat.” It was beyond time for her to go. Once Susan and Tony are gone, the show will be a tight, tough race and there’s no telling who’ll end up on top. That’s when the fun starts.

Until next week.