Dancing with the Stars Recap: Week Eight

Cody and Edyta, who’s still filling in for Julianne who hasn’t fully recovered from her appendectomy, performed an affably charming Foxtrot for their first dance. It wasn’t fireworks and lightning but it had a charm, grace and ease, which Cody’s mad frenetic energy (which we dig) usually lacks. Len was “pleasantly surprised. You had an elegance and I thought you did a top notch job.” “I never thought I would see it! Your most grown up performance to date,” Bruno gushed. “I loved the performance,” Carrie Ann agreed. “Not only are you nailing these numbers but you’re also adapting to a new partner.” Edyta even said, “You were a new man out there.” They receive three eights for a starting score of 24.

Our favorites, Brooke (the last woman left in the competition) and Derek (swoon), were next. Before their tango even started, we were SOLD as Derek dragged a board stiff (not to be confused with bored stiff) Brooke into position on the floor. We didn’t know we had a ticket to Buenos Aires, but we’re there! Sharp, fierce and as fiery as Brooke flaming red dress, their tango is caliente!!! We could feel the rose thorns between our teeth. Transportive. Brilliant. Untouchable. And the judges agreed. “That was more than a tango…Stunning,” exclaimed Bruno. “That is why you’re the last woman standing,” Carrie Ann explained. “You are beyond phenomenal. It was pitch perfect.” “You are truly the dream team,” Len said. “Derek, you come up with great choreography, Brooke you come out and perform it beautifully. Unfortunately, for me, I saw a lack of heel leads. I think you got out of sync. It was riddled with mistakes.” Are you kidding, Len? You’re an evil, crotchety, old fart. Bruno and Carrie Ann bestows 10’s, Len throws an 8 (ew), for a score of 28.

Performing a Quickstep, Maurice and Cheryl (in a pink and maroon gown that looked like Paris Hilton gone Dixie, Dolly Parton-style, forcing us to wonder if the wardrobe people hate her as much as we do or if she's just too pudgy for the cute costumes?) weren’t nearly as quick as we’d expect from the former fastest man on earth. It was okay but not fantastic. Carrie Ann loved his “head angles” (umm, searching for a compliment, much?). Len thought they “had great footwork.” Bruno said, “you usually deflate half way through, this week you kept it going with aplomb.” With eights across the board, they receive 24 points.

Lance and Lacey took on the Foxtrot next and it was smooth like caramel, very old Hollywood, classic ballroom with the L & L spunkiness thrown in. Cute as a button and sweet as apple pie. “You’re here on the wrong night, Extreme Makeover was last night” Len said in a feeble attempt at a joke/ABC plug at their transformation and embrace of technique and by-the-numbers ballroom. “That was a classic dance and yet you retained your quirky individuality that makes you unique. It was great” said Bruno. “You are truly a bright light and that was really great to watch,” Carrie Ann added. With two nines and an eight, they receive 26 points.

Next, Warren and Kym tangle with the Tango and their shot at redemption. While last week Warren was almost unrecognizable, this week he was James Bond of the dance floor with a license to thrill. The fire was back and he was scorching it up on all burners. THAT’s the Warren we adore. Bruno dubbed it “a mean Tango!” Carrie Ann said, “I see someone brought their sparkle game back to the dance floor and it worked! What you do that no one else does is you connect with the audience and you make us all feel like we’re in the number.” “Last week a block,” said Len, “This week on top!” Carrie Ann gives them a 10 (“I got one! I got one,” Warren said, completely shocked), Bruno and Len both bestowed 9’s for a score of 28, tying them for first with Brooke and Derek.

The second round of dances kicks off with Cody and Edyta’s Mambo. They lose their sync a few times and Cody looks a little bit like a deer in headlights but his solo is balls-to-the-wall right up to him launching himself onto the judge’s table, much to their surprise. Carrie Ann gives him an “A for effort, A for energy but it was a little erratic. Just contain a little bit more.” Len thought it was “a little stiff and angular but overall, I think you’ve done two good dances tonight. Well done.” “You definitely have the mambo fever,” Bruno offered, “but I appreciate the effort you put into this. It’s always better to put in more than less.” Three more eights, give them a total score of 48 out of 60.

Brooke and Derek also dance a Mambo but theirs has the fever and flavor of South America. From the very start of Brooke’s solo, it’s a sizzling platter of spicy goodness. “I thought that was a very ambitious performance. Overall, fantastic,” commended Len. “That was so exhuberant it could revive the dead,” Bruno insisted. “You’re a great dancer. What can I say? You really are incredible.” Carrie Ann actually offered mild criticism: “At times your posture felt a little awkward because [the dance] was so ambitious, it got a little frantic but still, a wonderful dance.” Three nines give them a final score of 55 out of 60.

The Paso Doble Maurice and Cheryl dance is totally captivating despite moments of stiffness from Maurice who is saved his solo cape work which is matador-licious. Their dance is almost a direct rip off of the group Paso but it’s still fabulous! “Strong, imposing, very very powerful…you’re doing well tonight” Bruno beams. “I love the focus, every step, you hit it!” Carrie Ann said.  Len said “I thought you did a really good job. Well done.” Three more eight give them 48, just like Cody and Edyta.

Lance and Lacey kick their Samba off with Lance’s totally awkward, uncomfortable solo. We’re going to blame Lacey’s choreography and not Lance but, either way, it’s a weak start to a less than stellar performance that ends with Lance face deep in Lacey’s feathered ass. Like we said, aaawkward.  Carrie Ann starts by explaining to everyone how difficult the Samba is before weakly telling them they did “a very good job,” a compliment that felt more scripted than genuine. “I’m sure you’re going to be back because you’re very popular,” says Len in the most blaring back-handed compliment of the season. Bruno said, “You did a great job.” With a nine, eight and seven, their final score is 50.

Warren and Kym’s Jive closes out the show. Warren’s solo is completely bumbling but totally jovial; the crowd eats it up with a spoon and we can already envision him in the final. This man knows how to work a crowd and we can’t help but smile watching him prance around the dance floor. “You optimize the saying ‘I could dance for joy,’” says Len. “You release such a contagious sense of fun that you can’t actually dissect the technique because everyone loves watching you. But the feet were a little bit flat,” Bruno contended. “I love all your energy,” Carrie Ann offered. “I’m a victim of inertia,” Warren laughed. With two nines and an eight (a little generous in our opinion), their final score of 54 puts them just behind Brooke and Derek who finish the night on top of the leader board while Maurice and Cheryl and Cody and Edyta rest at the bottom with scores of 48.

Until tomorrow when one more couple will be eliminated in the first truly painful cut of the season. There’s no more fat, we’re down to the real competitors now. It's going to be really hard to see someone go.