Let’s Translate the Body Language

Guy Ritchie and Madonna arrived at the world premiere of Guy's film RocknRolla at the Odeon Leicester Square in London trying to be picture-perfect people. They failed.

What do you see in this photo?

We’re no body language expert here’s what we notice:

-Those smiles are so fake and forced, they look like they’re about to pull a muscle. 

-Guy is holding onto Madonna with a pained look on his face that seems to say “If you don’t pretend you still love me, I’m gonna whup yo’ ass.” And Madonna is growling back “Have you seen my arms? I’d like to see you try, bitch! I’m diesel like Exxon.”

-Could Madonna’s arm be any stiffer? The mere touch of her husband makes her look ready to scream.

Just announce your divorce already!