See It or Skip It: Hannah Montana: The Movie

Does it really matter if this movie is good or bad?

It’s Hannah Montana and if you already know the finer plot points of Miley Cyrus’ teen-by-day/popstar-by-night Disney Channel sensation, no review is keeping you from the theater no matter how subpar the filmmaking might be.

That’s not to say Hannah Montana: The Movie is terrible; it’s just not a cinematic achievement.

The film, which starts out as a concert film and segues into a mild-mannered musical complete with cameo performances by Taylor Swift and Rascal Flatts, follows Miley Stewart/Hannah Montana (Cyrus) as her popstar persona begins to eclipse the real Miley. Her father, Robby Ray (played by her real dad, Billy Ray Cyrus), decides the best remedy is to shanghai her away from Hollywood; the land of Tyra Banks shoe store throw downs and return to their Tennessee roots, where Grandma Ruby (Margo Martindale) serves up sweet tea, and hunky cowboys (distractingly attractive Lucas Till) takes her for horseback rides and waterfall swim until she discovers the real star lurking inside…

Herself.

Cue power ballad.

The children squeal.

Life lesson learned and…

Scene.

What else would you expect from Disney?

Miley manages to tone down her usual laugh-track aided sitcom antics and transitions well to the big screen, but there’s only so much she can do with the hand she’s been dealt. We look forward to seeing how she tackles better material.

There are moments of distractingly misguided direction from Peter Chelsom, an old hand at cheese after helming such fluff as Serendipity and Shall We Dance?, like Cryus’ slo-mo hair flip to behold Till’s horseback entrance, or pratfalls like Miley’s brother Jackson (Jason Earles), who is relegated to a pittance of lines and less than a half dozen scenes, falling two stories on a ladder to find his head cocooned in a massive squash, and Billy Ray breaking granny’s beloved Elvis plates when trying to impress a lady, but we doubt the film’s target demo will notice.

The film’s strength lies in Cyrus’ likeability, star quality and talent. That’s why her fans love her and will support the movie no matter what. An unexpected joy is getting to watch her connect with her father on a deeper level than their TV show allows and seeing the tremendous love, respect and admiration they have for each other. Between that and the glorious Tennessee landscape, chaperones should be able to find something to enjoy.

We won’t tell you to see it or skip it since we know your mind is probably made up either way already. But we will say we’ve had “The Climb” stuck in our head all week and we challenge all takers to a Hoedown Throwdown.

—Sasha Perl-Raver