Hollywood Bites

We were thrilled to announce that Top Chef’s breakout star Fabio Viviani is getting his own show earlier this week.

Special for him, we’ve made Top Scallops with pasta, from Fabio’s homeland, tossed in garlic, lemon, parsley and crowned, of course, with scallops.

We would’ve made monkey ass but they were out at the grocery store.

There are only two things that make us feel better after a break up: food and some rebound lovin’.

So we’re offering Brian Austin Green both!

Just as long as we can call him David Silver while we get down to business.

Poor BAG split from his fiancé, Megan Foxy Fox, this week so we decided he needed the perfect breakup food to get him through this storm.

Cheater!

Beyonce thinks she’s gotten away with it but we’re standing up and saying loud and proud, while everyone else at the Oscars, including Zac Efron and Hugh Jackman, were singing their hearts out, you were warbling along to a prerecorded track like a pathetic, lazy coward.

We find that almost as offensive as the butt-ugliness that comes out of the House of Dereon.

That’s why we made you some Faux Fried Chicken.

It’s lipsyncing… 

We mean lip-SMACKING good.

Why faux fried chicken?

Our ode to Rihanna after her brutal assault by her boyfriend Chris Brown.

We feel we need to be very clear that we’re not making light of what happened to Rihanna; we are appalled by Chris Brown’s behavior and hope he gets a hefty jail sentence. In fact, we’re already working on a second recipe for him: Behind Bars Bars. We’re debating the addition of packed fudge in them. However, sometimes the most painful moments need two things: A little levity and something homemade.